Domestic Violence

TICK TOCK #2

TICK-TOCK

Quick check for dirty spots

TICK-TOCK

Another quick mop

TICK-TOCK

Must make sure the toothbrushes are in their assigned spots

TICK-TOCK

he’s on the dot

TICK TICK K-A-B-O-O-M

I… forgot to clean the clock

*******

When you meet her you would never know from her beaming face that she has been through hell and is still clawing her way out of it.

She can neither read or write and but is fortunate to have a job as a labourer. With this job as well as selling betelnut after work she manages to make ends meet and support her children.

She has an ex who won’t let go and prefers to sweet talk her into coming back with anything he can get his hands on. Its been years of constant physical, mental and verbal abuse.

She has taken out restraining orders but her ex does not adhere to them.

Recently he jabbed her in the thigh with a knife it would had been deeper had she not been standing behind a door forcing it to close while he swung wildly at her

I don’t know how to help her. Relocating her I think is not an option because she can not read or write and finding a job would be extremely difficult and I do not have the means to support her. We do not have welfare benefits in PNG so it seems like a dead end.

She had him arrested but is under immense pressure from his wantoks (relatives) to drop the charges and do away with the restraining orders.

I am moving to town in several days and I am very worried about her.

She lives in fear.

I feel like crap but don’t how else to help her.

Sometimes I think it would be better if I did not care. If I looked the other way. But I can’t so how the frig do I get rid of the guilt? The feeling of being useless and what do I do?

Sometimes life is so #$%&*.

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Help Amnesty International Australia stop sorcery-related violence & killings in PNG, both now and in the future.

Taste my tears

and

Silence my screams

Catch my hits

Stop my trembling

******************

Please click this link to donate  https://www.amnesty.org.au/support/index/33584?utm_campaign=PNGONLINEXMAS13&utm_source=SMEDIAXMAS13&utm_content=twttrshare&utm_medium=twitter

Taken from Amnesty International Australian website https://www.amnesty.org.au/support/index/33584?utm_campaign=PNGONLINEXMAS13&utm_source=SMEDIAXMAS13&utm_content=twttrshare&utm_medium=twitter

Women Not Witches

Julie suffered severe injuries when she was kidnapped and gang raped © Vlad Sokhin

Six-year-old Julie was kidnapped by four men in Lae. They raped her for eight hours and then left her on the street.

Her injuries are so severe that she can barely walk and can never have children.

VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN AND GIRLS IN PNG

Facing violence, torture and death is a horrifying reality for many women and girls in PNG.

Violence and murder

Despite new laws making sexual and domestic violence against women a crime, women and girls in PNG still face savage attacks and even death at the hands of strangers and family members. Gang members in the country admit to committing rape and armed robbery, with two-thirds of their victims being women.

Sorcery-related attacks

Women and girls in PNG are also the victims of sorcery-related attacks. Accused of witchcraft – often by neighbours or loved ones – they are subject to beatings, torture and death, with some even being burned alive.

Such cases are rarely brought to court, perpetuating the brutal tradition.

But things can change.

THE SOLUTION: A TWO-PRONGED APPROACH

To prevent further violence and death against women and girls in PNG, we need to act fast. We can tackle these horrendous issues head on from two angles.

  1. Short term: protecting women and girls at immediate risk of violence and killings in PNG.
  2. Long term: bringing about lasting change in PNG and throughout the entire Pacific region.

Short term

During times of crisis or danger, your support allows us to:

  • Help those in immediate danger of violence and death by providing rescue, relocation and shelter.
  • Encourage as many people as possible to take action on behalf of those at risk.
  • Provide publicity on cases of violence and death and let the PNG authorities know the world is watching.

Long term

With enough resources and research we can continue to:

  • Pressure the PNG government to ensure the implementation of legislation to protect women.
  • Work with local activists on the ground to help end violence against women in PNG for good.

UNITE to End Violence Against Women – Orange the World in 16 days

Orange the World in 16 days

The Secretary General’s Campaign UNITE to End Violence Against  Women has proclaimed the 25th of each month Orange Day. Among other  actions, the Orange Day invites us to wear something orange to highlight its calls for the eradication of violence against women without reservation, equivocation or delay.

This year, the UNITE Campaign is extending Orange Day to 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence, starting November 25, International Day to End Violence Against Women, through December 10, Human Rights Day.

Facts and Figures

  • Up to 70 per cent of women experience violence in their lifetime.
  • Between 500,000 to 2 million people are trafficked annually into situations including prostitution, forced labour, slavery or servitude, according to estimates. Women and girls account for about 80 per cent of the detected victims
  • It is estimated that more than 130 million girls and women alive today have undergone FGM/C, mainly in Africa and some Middle Eastern countries.
  • The cost of intimate partner violence in the United States alone exceeds $5.8 billion per year: $4.1 billion is for direct medical and health care services, while productivity losses account for nearly $1.8 billion.

From the United Nations Website for more information  click here…. http://www.un.org/en/events/endviolenceday/

Wooohoooo – PNG Govt passed a New Family Protection Law

The Lion ROARS
and

the Jungle stirs

************

PNG Family Protection Bill passed
-ISLAND BUSINESS

PORT MORESBY, PNG — Papua New Guinea Parliament has passed the Family Protection Bill making domestic violence an offence under PNG laws.

Attorney General and Justice Minister Kerenga Kua who introduced the Bill received an overwhelming 63-0 votes to pass the bill that will give teeth to the current interim protection orders issued by the district court.

Kua said the highly sought after interim protection orders by destitute women do not have a legislative backing where victims often find themselves in situations where interim protection orders are not enforceable.

“When a breach occurs there is no penalty under the law so the cycle of violence in the family continues.”

He said the Family Protection Bill is neutral and intends to protect both man and woman who have had domestic violence in their homes. “The Bill recognizes that domestic violence of any kind is not an acceptable behavior.”www.islandsbusiness.com/news/papua-new-guinea/2953/png-family-protection-bill-passed/

FROM THE HEARTS OF INNOCENTS #1

ENOUGH

We take the pain
Enough is enough

We cry in pain
Enough is enough

We live in fear
Enough is enough

So listen
Enough is enough

by Karlsem Wilmot 14 yrs old

************

It is easier to build strong children then to repair broken men – Frederick Douglas

A New Day

A New Day

Her body ached from him. He had left his mark all over her body.

She shifted in the bed straining for any sound that came back. Would he come back and join her? She wondered as he rattled around the kitchen.

She lay on the bed sore from last nights games, thinking about his smile and the tenderness that would fill his eyes when he looked at her when they had first met. The look that would lure you in and make you believe that true love wasn’t just a dream.  It always worked. She could never resist.

Last night was their anniversary; it was definitely a night she would never forget! 

He whistled as he did whatever he was doing. She wondered which child he was talking too as he asked about what his or her plans were for the day?

It was a one side conversation, as always.

She turned again and realized clothes’ were flung everywhere across the room, her favorite meri blouse was ripped in two, one piece dangled off the bed and the other on the plastic chair in the far corner.

 

They had come in late after a night out at his favorite drinking place Lizard Lounge. She prayed the noise wouldn’t wake the kids or the neighbors but knew that due to the thin walls it was like telling the sun not to rise the next day. 

Was it really 10 years ago that they had moved into this unit? It was built on to another house. The two rooms were tiny compared to the kitchen slash living room, every door and window was a different size and the concrete floor rose and fell haphazardly throughout the unit. They shared the shower and toilet with the main house.

They first met one week after she began working at Papindo, Papua New Guinea’s biggest retail chain. 

She had not made it into Grade 9 and he looked so handsome in cut jeans and a t-shirt.  He was studying accounting at the University of Papua New Guinea.

Just two months after they first met he blurted out that he loved her and wanted to marry her.  This was the cheapest place they could find. He reassured her between kisses that it was just until he had finished university and started working.

At K100 per fortnight it was the only place she could afford on her wages. Of course she got pregnant almost immediately, first came Ruth then Tony. After Tony she secretly went on the pill.

She was surprised he remembered their anniversary especially since he had left one morning two years ago for work and never came back.

He looked plump, his clothes looked new and smelt nice. He wore an expensive watch but then again image was everything, right! After all he was with a big accounting firm in downtown Port Moresby.

He came into the room and grabbed a towel. She quickly closed her eyes so he would think she was still sleeping.  He had left his favorite toy on the old filing cabinet that served as a clothes’ cupboard. He grinned as he walked past it to go up to the main house and have a shower.

She got up and touched it.  Yes… she decided when he came back they would play another game. He had kept her up all night playing games so surely they could play another.

He strode in, still whistling and opened his drawer; he, of course was the only family member with a proper drawer for his clothes’. They had to be folded in a special way.

“Karennnn,” he roared when he saw them all messed up. Then he froze when he heard the click and felt the cold metal against his head.

She put a finger to her lips and ‘shhhhed’ him as he looked turned and gawked at her. It hurt to hold the gun steady.

“You know the rules baby; no screaming until I say so,” Karen whispered.

She knew his roar had sent their children into hiding.

The surprised look  quickly disappeared before he roared again, foul words tumbled out of his mouth as he lurched forward. She grinned as she looked at him. He hesitated and stepped backward.

 “What’s wrong honey,” she purred not bothering to stop the smile spreading across her face.

“Isn’t this why you came back so we could play?” she asked arching an eyebrow.

Oh he looked so vulnerable.

“Baby…I love you. I’m sorry I know last night I got a bit rough but you should have given me the money when I told you too,” he said, tears slowly sliding down his chocolate skin. He always had perfect skin.

“I know….,” she whispered.

 The sound was deafening. She had never heard the gun fired before.

She sat on the floor watching him when the front door squeaked open.   

“Karen… the police are here,” the mother from the main house screeched. Karen had heard the heavy slap of her feet followed by unfamiliar footsteps.

The bedroom door crashed open. She heard someone gasp behind her and ever so slowly turned to look at them.

 “Oh Karen,” the neighbor groaned almost inaudibly before reaching for the towel he had dropped on the floor. She stopped when she realized it was soaked with blood.

The policeman stepped back and stared at her for what seemed like ages before yelling out to his colleague to call for an ambulance.

“It’s okay I’m fine” she mumbled as the neighbor carefully put a meriblouse on her that she had found somewhere. It looked like a tent but felt like it was made from barbed wire when it brushed against her skin.

As Karen walked to the ambulance she heard her daughter screaming. She smiled and looked around to see if she could see her so as to reassure her. The neighbor kept shoving people aside making sure they did not touch her.

Another cop held the ambulance door open in his sunglasses she saw her reflection. The huge meriblouse didn’t hide much. Was that an M, she saw carved into her skin between her breasts? M for Mathew. Just another one to add to all the others he had carved on her throughout their time together including the slashes and cigarette burns.

They didn’t hurt as much as they normally did.  Besides she knew he was careful to never touch the bits that were usually exposed like her lower arms, legs, neck and face. The rest she could cover like she always did.

Sitting in the ambulance she looked out. The sun seemed brighter. The sky so blue so why was her daughter crying and her son looking so serious? Today was a good day. Yes, it was a glorious new day!

 note: A meriblouse is a traditional blouse.

****************************************************************

I wrote this short story after meeting two women. One was an woman inmate who had killed her husband. She told me she did it to escape from his abuse. Another a women who bears the physical scars of an violent abusive relationship and was made to play games similar to the one in the story.  

It’s not a poem. Still got writer’s block. Praying it will go away soon.

Maiya

 

  

  

LOST

Lost

 Far away eyes,

Runaway mind,

 

Hiding,

From terrors,

 undefined,

 

New friends,

Invisible

 to the ordinary eye,

 

Another home,

Another husband,

Another life,

 

Worlds friendlier,

safer than reality,

 

places,

 where we can’t be

 worlds that hold,

no memories

 S.E

‘For you I will’

********

There are several ways to lose loved ones to Domestic Violence.

I have written about one friend. This is another.